Halloween

It's Halloween!! I can't say I am doing much of anything tonight. I think we might be giving out candy but I am not 100% sure. I haven't so much as thought about getting ready for tonight. If I do anything at all it'll be giving out candy. And if I already feel this crappy its unlikely that I will be doing that. It's no secret of how poor my lungs are. It just comes more to light when its your favorite holiday and you are thinking twice about doing nothing. Conserve my energy for another day?? Why yes please, or well just to make it to tonight?? Yeah thats my reality now a days. I am OK with it, I accept my body has its limitations and I also know when I should not be pushing my luck.

So what is a girl to do?? Watch a movie and love on my kitten!! She actually turned a box that has stuff in it into a bed with a rag that she pulled off the tread climber. She's a smart little thing but anyways. I have gotten use to not being able to do certain things especially since I have gotten sicker and my lung function has dropped considerably. There's certain things my lungs just can not handle, and there are certain things that will guarantee me a lung infection. Which is something we absolutely try to avoid. I use to be admitted to the hospital when my lungs are this poorly and now its every day life. So we make the best of what we got. Sometimes that means not doing something you love to ensure your health.

As much as I want to dress up and hand out candy I also have to way the odds. I have to think about the consequence of my action and how far I can push my body. Yesterday I walked from the truck to a place to sit at a local restaurant and I was visibly short of breath. I wrote it off to Wonder Woman as I was OK. Which I was and she's like no I am a nurse you can not full me. So I can't help but wonder what getting up and down to hand out candy would do to me. After the effort of getting a costume together. So it sounds like it won't end well which I am ok with. There is much more important things I want to do with my time like going to see the All Father. I also have tattoo's coming up and I much rather be healthy for them!!

But I guess I best get off of here I have left overs calling my name.
Love Y'all
~Poppet

I haven't been up to much lately. I have been working on my sleeve and doing Qi Kong that the All Father has introduced me to recently. I am really enjoying it. It focuses on breathing and small even movements. Its a low stress impact on your body and it also brings in proper diet. Tho I usually follow a proper diet anyways its always nice to have new ideas for food as long as I can eat it of course. A long with Qi Kong I also use mediation to focus my mind. Yes there is a point to this, when battling a illness or a disease of any kind its not just physical health its your entire body. Health is so much more then just pumping your body full a medicine and possible surgeries it, mental heath, its proper diet, its exercise that your body can handle. And for some its about spiritual health. I am not gonna for God down your throat at all, and many people have different spiritual beliefs this is jut something personal to me. 

So often alls I hear is, Meds, Chest PT, Saline. What is Superman doing for you?? Why isn't more being done?? There is only so much he can do, there is only so much medicine can do. I think people forget this. I am so blessed I have people who surround me and encourage me to be a better me. I get texts sometimes from Ms. J. showing me pics of foods that are good for my lungs. I have a lists of food that are "mucus producing" which I try to avoid. I am vegan, and gluten free for my heart. I also eat a high salt, high cal diet thats decent in sugar. I also learned that small frequent meals is much better then a large meal. I also have to eat low acidic foods because of the Pulmozyne but thats OK we found a balance of what works.

When it comes to spiritual health I also combine this with mental health in this picture. I know the CF foundation has an entire section devoted to this and I follow a lot of people that are so depressed because of their health. Wonder Woman has told me more then once that most people have a "why me" attitude and sometimes I admit i do myself. Which why I always take time to center myself. Usually thru meditation or  Qi Kong. I focus on my breathing and centering myself with positive energy. I even pray. God can work miracles. I have tried to reach to some people who do react to their health in a negative and let them know I have your disease to we can get thru this together but they are so quick to shut me down. Which I guess lead by example is what I have to do here.  

We as society so often forget. Being chronically ill and coping with a disease is SO much more then science. It is SO much more then hospitals and pumping your body full of chemicals. It's about maintaining a healthy diet, its about being active even if your just sitting there and doing exercise, its about staying true to what you love. Its about surrounding yourself by the people you love. I know Wonder Woman has sacrificed everything for me, and the All Father is always checking up on me and always finding ways to improve my spiritual health. I wish there was a big community for coming together in a positive way and sharing ways that we as a community can work together find ways to cope in a healthy way. 

I guess I will leave this here, I made a lovely hummus high in salt and low in fat and its calling my name!!

Love Y'all

~poppet

inspiration

A few things have been going on lately but nothing that exciting for the most part. I got to spend some time with the All Father recently. He decided to learn Qi Gong and has been kind enough to dedicate sometime with me to help me learn. Its not stressful on the body and its an ancient art form and he knows i loved Martial Arts. I have to say after this weekend and just 15 mins of doing the basic beginners part my lungs uncramped just a little bit. Enough for me to get relief from the intense pain I can feel from CF. You know I can live with the pain, I do it daily and its not the much for me anymore I see it as a daily thing and a lot of the pain I had came from this weekend. We had a major storm hit us. It made me so sick. I remember tell the All Father friday I didn't trust the storms path and we got hit hard. My poor little lungs got beat up pretty badly and my sweet Kitten curled up on my right side and let me breathe on her as she always does on bad days. We finally got my oxygen back down to 3 and I am so so so glad that I have the option of Qi Gong to help now. 

I also had to giggle at the fact he know keeps rice and soy sauce at his house. I am not sure its for me but to have my favorite option to eat at his house is just epic. 

I always here from my friends and how sad they are for me but the thing is, they don't need to be sad for me. I do not lead that sad of a life. Just the opposite. I have true friends who love me, and I have 2 parents that love me. I am also a stay at home kitty mommy that follows her true passion in life with food and makeup. I can also donate my time out of love and compassion. I do not alway charge people for my work, there are times I give my time to them with no questions asked. This is a true joy I want people to feel. I want people to know that kindness in this world still exist. I don't want anyone to feel they owe something for whatever it is they are asking for. Just something I learned from the insanity my life brings me. 

I also found I love educating people on my crazy life. My insanity that people see when they over look my joy will one day help someone that I have never met. And that right there is worth it. Yes this weekend was pretty painful, yes I had a concerned family and kitten. But I made it thru somehow (we all know Wonder Woman got me thru it) and now I can help someone else thru it. And isn't that what life is all about?? Helping others?? Maybe thats something I learned from my family or maybe its something I learned from friends who have been there at my worst. Or the shirt that Poison Ivey had made for me that I now where when I have to go into the hospital for good luck. But whatever it is I hope I can pass this onto someone. Unconditional love, and finding your true passion in life. 

I may have 3 diseases that beat me down and leave me breathless, but my life is so much more then that. I have people surrounding me helping me survive this life, helping fight for my life to live another day, to even add years to my life. I want people to not look at my hardships I want people to look at the joy in my life. I always tell the All Father and Wonder Woman i am going to change this world and that I will do!! I have no idea how I am going to do this but I am going to do this!! 

Just a little inspiration for y'all today!!

Love Y'all

~Poppet